Cut
by Bryher
Summary: The yawning abyss was too tempting. It could end now. Oneshot/Songfic/Sherlock Implied OC.


Title: Cut

Rating: T

Summary: The yawning abyss was too tempting, and there was no coming back from the brink. It could end now.

Authors Notes: Written with an accompaniment: Artist, Plumb. Song: Cut

* * *

_I'm not a stranger, _

_No, I am yours. _

_With crippled anger, _

_And tears that still drip sore. _

The view from the docklands would have been more interesting one hundred years or so before this day. Ships with small lights and smaller sails would have drifted across the swell, their captains rum-soaked and jolly. The water would've been comparatively clear, though the usual flotsam and jetsam would have clung to the wooden swell breakers and moor points. Timber, a rum bottle, perhaps a body or two...

Now...

Well.

The Addler shifted her feet, toes frozen and bare against the hard concrete. Blood trailed steadily onto the floor from the wounds that wrapped around her ankles. However, the rope burns were a minor irritation. Lifting a hand to her cheek, The Addler felt the strong welt that raised the skin over the bone. Her lips, devoid of their usual colour were pale and split, the sharp red trail from the corner of her mouth a grim reminder of the hard hands and harder faces that loomed out of the dark. They were the faces of nightmares and Hammer Horrors, the kind of men that one could only find when all other evils were booked for the evening's entertainment.

Below her, the river lapped gently against the side of the dock. The scum of the water formed a crust that would probably be more of an issue than the cold water. The Addler didn't even want to know the kinds of dirt and disease in that foam. The only lights on the river were from the other bank, upon which there were several smart new wine bars and restaurants. There was little that could be accomplished by screaming for help. Everyone on the other side was soaked in liquor by now. The Addler wasn't sure whether or not she'd scream even if there were a chance of rescue. It wasn't in her nature.

_I do not want to be afraid. _

_I do not wanna die inside just to breathe in._

_I'm tired of feeling so numb. _

_Relief exists- I find it when I am cut. _

'You know that this is all very well and good, but if he was here, he'd save his own skin.' The Addler closed her eyes and took a long breath. Moriarty stood to the left of her vision, just out of sight but his cruel tones clear cut against the frigid air.

'You could be saving yourself a lot of trouble, here. He doesn't care about you. He's _used_ you.'

The Addler smiled. 'Please. Could you be any more _conventional_?' she asked, drawing out the sentence into a mocking snarl.

Moriarty giggled. 'You're right. I have to say, I do love those old action movies. They give a mastermind such classic ideas.'

The Addler snorted. 'A mastermind? I'm surprised you can see daylight with that exceptionally large head of yours wedged so far up-' she broke off with a cry of pain as a heavy fist slammed into her shoulder from behind. Her knees buckled and she dropped onto the jetty, biting her lip in an attempt to stop the hot tears that threatened to spill over.

'Have you met Golem?'Moriarty asked lightly. 'He's quite the first impressionist.'

'Charmed,' The Addler whispered to the ridged grey concrete.

'So, once again, Miss Addler. Where is Sherlock Holmes?'

_I feel alone here, _

_I'm cold here. _

_I don't want to die. _

The lights that bounced against the warehouses were blue. Dimly, The Addler realised that this meant that there were emergency vehicles nearby, but lifting her head from the blessedly cool floor seemed like too much of an effort at that precise moment in time. The yawning abyss was too tempting, and there was no coming back from the brink. It could end now.

The view from the angle at which she lay was not a good one. She could see that her foot- which really was quite painful, was bent at an unnatural angle. The viscous red liquid that pooled from somewhere in the vicinity of her torso and leaked into her vision from the left was growing. Half-heartedly, The Addler flexed her long, slender fingers against the cool floor. Tapping out a rhythm that she had learned as a child, she focussed on making the taps in time with one another, focussed on anything other than her eyesight, which had begun to dim at the edges.

_I am cut. _

_I am not alone. _

_I am not alone. _

_I'm not a stranger. _

_No, I am yours. _

'Evening, John,' The Addler whispered. The good doctor looked horrified.

'A-Addler...' he stuttered. Then, army training kicked the braincells that had flown into panic out and into recuperation mode. '_Lestrade,'_ he bellowed. 'Paramedics, _now_!'

The thundering of shoes on the staircase up to the roof of the warehouse seemed louder than it should have done. The Addler closed her eyes and thought bemusedly that they weren't in time with her rhythm. The shoes faltered as a voice snapped, 'Out of the way, sir. Can't you see the young lady is hurt?'

The Addler didn't open her eyes.

'I don't want to see him, John.' she whispered. 'Send him away.'

The Doctor said nothing, but she heard the soft tread of steps move away. Her phone vibrated in her pocket, untouched by Moriarty and Golem. Closing her eyes, she resolved to read whatever it was he had to say later. As the first shot of morphine drifted over The Addler, she yawned.

_I find relief- I find it when_

_I am cut. _

'Thank you for not telling him,' John murmured later in the ambulance.

'You're welcome,' The Addler slurred around the morphine. 'Phone,' she murmured. 'Text- read...delete?' Her eyes closed and she stilled, the arms of Morpheus finally pulling her under.

John frowned and patted her gently until he found the offending article.

One new message.

_Collateral damage. Sorry. SH

* * *

_

Haven't written anything in a long while- been messy.

Reviews would be lovely.


End file.
